Tuesday, March 06, 2007
Sometimes you've just got to slow down ...
I was right.
It was one of those weeks.
I won't go into details, but it's been a b*tch and it's only Tuesday. Suffice it to say I had to stop everything this weekend to deal with a crisis, one which did not resolve happily. But it resolved peacefully and that's all that can be expected, I guess.
I was just recovering from that when I landed in a mess at work. My company, as you may recall, was consumed by another bigger company. That meant a blizzard of email on top of the snow-blizzard. So when I got to the office on Monday, I had to shovel all that sh*t off my desk. Six hours later, I was working again.
By the time I got home on Monday night I felt like somebody had punched me several times with large, hard objects. I flopped into my chair and just ... stopped. I stopped and thought and allowed all the stress to ooze out of me. I stopped and just ... thought. I let memories and peace and quietness wash over me. I didn't worry about my email program, my release dates, my promotional efforts, or what I needed to accomplish.
For about an hour I sat and just remembered those who are departed, animal and human. I remembered it so vividly that I could almost hear the voices or the purrs. When I finally allowed the memories to slip away and 'came back' to this time and place, I felt as though I'd been strengthened by them and ready to face the world again.
That feeling lasted until today, of course, when I went into work and found yet more nonsense awaiting me in the form of paperwork, bureacracy, and software that doesn't quite work the way it should.
But I know that I can go to that happy place again and revisit those who are gone. That is a consoling thought. When I need them, they'll be there.